Oh Yeah, It’s Gods Will All Right

"God works in mysterious ways His wonders to perform."

There is a reason they walk barefoot thru muddy, trash-paved streets lugging tainted drinking water

Those devastated by huge floods can take heart knowing their suffering is all part of His greater plan

Of course there’s meaning to lives snuffed out without any dignity by failing trains, and rolling buses

Totally bereft earthquake victims can take solace in the fact that it all has a purpose and a meaning

Mothers of suicide bombers are comforted knowing their boys relax with 72 virgins “up” in paradise

The mass extinction we are causing is but a small part of the inscrutable will of our all-knowing God

Why only the greedy and sociopathic arise to lead us shall be revealed in the full richness of time

My diabetes, hypertension, atherosclerosis and COPD are but tiny pieces in an infinitely large picture

That billions must struggle just to survive on a dollar a day is but a small part of a beautiful mystery

The apparent emptiness of lives ended in filthy nursing home helplessness and fear is an illusion

Their targeting innocent schoolgirls with AK-47s and suicide vests will actually make sense in the end

There’s no need to be concerned that our ordained fruitful multiplication devastates this tiny planet

There is rhyme and reason in using bulldozers to bury mutilated corpses of the collaterally damaged

Our treating of the beasts of the fields as bulk factory raw material inputs requires no justification

Dying forests, drying rivers and spreading deserts are hints from an infinite incomprehensible wisdom

Smothering in O.D.’d vomit, cold, wet and dirty in a garbage-strewn alley is simply one isolated clue

He has led them to forsake scientific research to instead build complex, yet flawed financial scams

It’s God’s Will that his messengers on earth seduce children & perform sodomy, though both are sins

Killing for peace should not be a cause for confusion in our hearts - as will someday be made clear

Why our omnipotent God needs to test us though he already knows all results, stays beyond our grasp

We can only solve His cosmic riddle regarding our existence with a blind leap into deep religious faith

Certainly there is no need to question why He chose only us as His exceptional people on this earth

There is a hidden purpose to my watching football 16 hours a week and discussing stats another 10

He has a plan for the homeless so I ignore them daily and besides, I tithe weekly at my mega-church

God won’t command me to recycle and Jesus never preached of lowering consumption or energy use

Meddling with divine climate change is actually an act of human arrogance, far too full of our hubris

He commands we topple evil regimes which are actually the bedeviled client states of His false gods

It’s God’s will that those recruiting suicide bombers remain alive to gather new martyrs for His glory

Don’t fret over why my child chews lead-based paint chips while yours lives 99.9% bacteria free

There’s a far deeper meaning to blowing up occupied girls schools than it is now ours to be privy to

Mother’s lying senseless in her own wastes for many years of dementia must not sway our deep faith

With His silent pre-approval they scan our vapid tweets, texts, emails, cell calls and facebook posts

Under his plan I segued seamlessly from unemployment to disability and thence to my social security

That He chose lives of ignorance, poverty and suffering for them but not me is not mere random fate

So you see, we don’t have to ask why we alone are the entitled and exceptionist people of this world

We can sleep peacefully knowing that it’s all simply a small part of God’s perfect and mysterious plan

Wrong But Real, Right But Imaginary

No one should perish in shocking and horrible trauma but, realistically, that will never stop occurring

Lives of exemplary sacrifice must certainly find their reward, but throughout history, they have not

We seem genetically programmed to make sense of things tho far too often there is none to be found

Cruel dictators should justly be punished in the end, but mostly they die peacefully, in their sleep

Keepers of the true faith should not be financially and sexually corrupt, but that will never change

We put off many things until we have more time but, guess what: They will remain forever undone

No innocent child should suffer cruelly from a malignancy, but it is statistically certain that she will

It seems like all men should be created equal yet it will always be, but for His grace that, There I go

Its unquestionably wrong that our seniors are targeted for scams but someone’s always ready to do it

Clearly those who take care of themselves should enjoy long healthy lives, yet often they die young

Our minds evolved to seek reason and meaning in all events, but then god works in mysterious ways…

Corporate success should require higher moral standards, but most top CEOs are empty sociopaths

Those in positions of trust and control must never violate their charges, yet it only happens every day

No one denies that the elderly should be stores of wisdom but we simply discard them as irrelevant

It’s not right for us to mortgage our children’s futures on temporary pleasures but we just can’t stop

The rich should find comfort in their wealth, but only getting richer satisfies them – and just briefly

You shouldn’t treat your mother and sisters as saints and all other women as whores, but you do!

Certainly virtue must be its own reward but all too often that reward is simply poverty and scorn

Amoral greed should not be a prerequisite to financial success, but you need only look up the ladder

Years of allegiance to some sports franchise should be rewarded by a championship: That was a joke

Good products should not require lies and exaggeration to sell but since everybody else does it…

Assuredly lives of pious and long-suffering poverty yield a place in God’s house. Right...sure they do

Darling little boys would never torture kittens but guess what…they also mature into mass shooters

Noble scientists do not fudge data or results but BigPharma studies are quite often rigged in advance

Banks shouldnt hedge against deliberately bad funds they sell to their clients, but they’ll do it again

Happiness should be independent of phony marketing media stereotypes but, sadly for us, it is not

Religion should never be used to rationalize hatred and violence, however, that’s what they all do

The rains should come and the snows should fall but depressingly, now we see it’s not true anymore

Hungry gold miners should never poison the land with mercury but still...It is the cheapest way

Newborn fawns should get a chance to get on their feet, yet if a predator should see them…

Bankruptcy must not be a way to more easy credit but just take a look at your moocher neighbors

We like to think we’ll live happily ever after but often we die very soon after our forced retirement

It’s not fair that women cannot preach while abstinent priests enjoy each other and their choir boys

The blessed free market should prevent demand-driven extinctions but instead that’s what it fosters

You should have time for the important things you’ve always put off but most die senile and drugged

The evil and immoral is often the reality while the moral, good and right is just a snowflake’s tale

White Men To The Rear

Sir excuse me, Sir! could you please not be so loud? It makes us all so nervous we simply cannot think

You must learn to give equal opportunity so we can take our fair places, so, you just get to the back

Wait, wait, wait – Is that a handicapped non-veteran back there? Send him up if he’s vegan and quiet

Gays step forward, you’re coming up front with us - to remake the world in a more fashionable image

We don’t need to work 60 hr weeks to get ahead for we must attain a balanced life with equal pay

No, you dont get disability just cuz as a kid they always drugged you up ta make ya stay still in school

GaHead just ride off into the sunset with a 6Pack in ur ram tough truck - and dont bother comin back

Yeah, you better find meaning on yer Harley cuz you aint gonna get no satisfaction at work no more

You been in charge too long so you must just graciously step down…into impoverished minority status

Your good old boy network is racist and sexist, unlike empowerment groups for women, gays & blacks

Anyway, you do know damn well real men don’t go and whine at like whatever girly support meetings

Maybe that loud and doltish pride in your virgin ignorance will keep seeing you thru…or maybe not

You better start developing some kind of a handicap to ensure your place in our brave new workforce

After all, you cant pass the physical, mental or drug tests required to serve in our great armed forces

No, no! - Your obesity, high blood pressure and cholesterol don’t count towards our handicap quota

There’s no money to retrain you cause we gotta teach english to your amnestied illegal replacements

You aint never been victimsa prejudice so thers no reason ta create new entitlement programs faya

And don’t you go try startin white men only like awareness groups or such you neo-nazi monsters

Better start takin classes in metrosexuality sos you can communicate properly with yer new superiors

You can sleep well knowing you contribute to social equality - By givin up a decent standard of living

You’re right - Taking on college debt would be a bad investment because you’ll be hired the very last

Yes, you must pay child support & lifetime alimony even though she makes way more than you do

You’ll be the last ones to get affordable dental care but you’ll always be on your own for your eyes

By the way, keep yer nasty football viewing habit to yourselves and out of polite office conversations

Get used ta suckin up ta bored, fat and feisty womenAcolor government welfare administrators

Don’t even think about goin on some shootin rampage, just put that gun in yer own mouth, in silence

No, we don’t want no novels depicting empty struggles after yer fall from an entitled redneck grace

Sure, you can still vote, gahead: Choose any from our progressive slate of truly entitled minorities

You done lazed, drank and swilled yerselves sick and now a loud and arrogant pride is all you got left

You been outbred and outhustled by unending wavesa job-stealin immigrints and single mothers

You stay with the Fox ta make outraged soundbite sensea this corrupt and unfairly rigged new system

Hey, Look - ya still got yer personal savior who kin explain alla them overcomplicated issues taya

Better get used ta findin meanin in housecleanin and satisfaction from coupon clippin & kid schleppin

Learn not to get mad when yer ignored, rejected, forgotten, blown off, put down and laughed at

Realize that yer kids start off behind but then wont get the chances that others just take for granted

Best you adopt that victim mentality and pick up on the pro-moocher mindset…just sos ta get by

That Whatever Nonsense Recompense

    That which compensates for an injury…

Useless desert fish, tiny spotted owls and ugly boreal toads wont be winning any damages, not ever

For courts have held that jobs and money trump the natural infrastructure that allows both to exist

Thus, nobody will be liable for the wonderful progress that has made our fair land what it is today

So plead not for a false recompense from those who act as his His divinely-ordained good stewar

***

They caint hold me responsible fer the filthiness of the rivers so briefly at His profit-minded mercy

Jesus aint gonna turn us away from them pearly gates fer like envirmental degredation, ya know

I don’t need no liability insurance ta exercise my god-given right tatha pursuita individyul happiness

They caint ever come after me fer carin more about my pickup than their wack sustainabilly crack

No sir, wild animals got no more justice comin than such as our cow, pig and chicken factory inputs

Nobodys gettin in any trouble fer spendin years glued ta good old foopbawl on the latest bigscreen

Theys no punisment comin cause you ran up a miyon$ charge fer fastfood hypertension and diabetus

You wont havta pay fer the damage and injury ur drug habits didta ur fatherless, bred-fer-prison kids

You wont be getting billed fer overfertilizin or mixin toxics with reciclables in ur overflowin trash can

Stay kickd back in ur exceptionist easy chair cause ur already pre-approved fer a good seat in heaven

Relax, polar bears aint bringin no class action suits and nobody’s goin ta jail fer lame climate change

We aint grantin slum kids no miyons fer they smog-induced asthma and lead-caused brain damage

All them extermenated indians aint gettin nothin just cuz they got up in the waya r manyfest destiny

And them jews’ll just be lucky if they dont get turned on fer like the 50^th time, again, real soon now

Them too weak ta raise they voices will be heaped higher wif injusteces, on out to the event horizon

We gotta keep movin forward so you wont see no disgraced former leaders ever brought to justice

Dyin butterflies and bees aint got no public defenders or prosecutin attorneys overta ther side

Wont be no disaster aid comin toanya god’s cretures who lost ther homes on them dyin coral reefs

Who you gonna petition fer relief from the vast swarmsa precious humans just wantin the good life?

Nobody’s liable fer destroyin that livin envirnment that makes alla r triviel pursuts even possible

No patriotic cleancoal lobbyist’ll be fined fer workin hard ta save traditional families jobs and money

Wont nobody be sued when ther aint no more fossil water left tabe sucked outta them aqwefers

Thaint no fund set aside ta compensate the future fer our wasteful and arrogantly-willful destruction

Aint gonna be no class action suits on behalfa victims athat mass extinction we’re so blindly perpin

That illegal World Court cant rule that r overpopulation is the only problem that we really shud solve

Honest citizens wont be gettin no bills for soil destruction and deforestation or pesticide abuse

Nobody’s representin ocean plankton doomed to eat our microplastic litter thats fillin up they homes

Bangaledeshis wont have recourse or insurance when ther land is warshed away by risin sea levels

The gumint aint gonna pay out for lettin miyonsa lives be rooined jist ta get more alcohol tax money

Overpaid doctors wont be brought to justice fer pushing hi-tech procedures over simple pervention

Wont be no CEO bonus clawbacks fer offshorin research, production and support ta raise stock prices

& nobodys gonna bring suit aginst us on behalf of the grandkids whose lives we have impoverished

Look, All Men Are Created Equal, Really.

We hold this <unsubstantiated> truth to be self-evident…

I am of those tangled family lines raised in public housing by a single parent for some 5 generations

My parents lay in bed reading child-raising books and playing Mozart to me - inside mommy’s womb

My mom didn’t know she was pregnant or cut back on partAing until I was 4 months inside her tummy

Mommie took vitamin and nutritional supplements, had lots of ultrasounds and walked on a treadmill

My dad smacked the shit right out my momma and lefup outta here before I ever seen him

My parents took birthing classes together before I was ever conceived

Cigarettes helped my mother relieve her sufferings from withdrawal during my fetal development

She always killed 99.97% of all the germs in our safe and lovely suburban home

The teachers could see that I was doomed to failure from my earliest school days, so they ignored me

Everyone always assured my family that I certainly was an especially gifted and high-achieving child

I amused my growing brain by peeling off flakes of lead-filled paint to chew upon

I had so much warmth and stimulation that it appeared to them that I grew wise before my years

We got our nutrition from government programs that paid for us to eat from cans and cellophane

My developing mind and body were nurtured by the very best in current pop science nutrition wisdom

I had project TVs and boomboxes pumping rap and ad music into my crib 24x7 that got me my rhythm

My mom drove me to pre-kindergarten classes and play dates starting before I was 3

I was shuffled in with my drunk grannie by social services when mom lost our welfare apartment

I was surrounded and nurtured by grandparents, uncles and aunts all the days of my childhood

Nobody even noticed I needed glasses til I accidentally got my first eye test one day in the 5^th grade

Mom kept me strictly to the various meds they prescribed for the tragic ADHD masking my brilliance

I was chauffeured to all kinds of lessons and sports activities every day after school and all weekend

I learned independence being a latchkey kid whose only parent was off hoin fuh hart drugs

Everyone assured my folks from the very beginning that I would attend a very good college

School stopped working for me once I got pregnant for the first time, in the 9^th grade

I had a pet dog named Tuffie that I still miss to this day

I grew up with rats, roaches, lice, scabies and bedbugs as well as asthma

My slightly crooked smile was repaired for less than $5000

My teeth were soaked in sugar until they all rotted and simply fell out before I ever saw a dentist

We flew off to pricey destinations for all our well-deserved spring, summer and holiday breaks

We stole a car and took a joyride way out to where everbody knew we dinaha no biness

I occasionally mowed our perfectly green lawn for an extra $150 a month spending allowance

They showed me how ta make money carryin bags of whatever stuff around fa them

Now I have these allergies and auto-immune disorders and they say it’s cause I never got dirty

Shivved an enemy banger in a prison fight who turned out to be some uncle I neva even knew I hat

Spent 6 years part-Aing to get my degree in Communications and then became this chatty barista

Don’t run the screets nomo cause these bullet wounds left me all limpin an huffin like some old fool

I Keep Doing These Stupid Things

I might glance, but you cannot force me to see

I may hear, but I don’t actually have to listen

I considered, but I am certainly not about to heed

I can continue talking - and keep saying nothing

I struggle on, though I still refuse to fight

I laugh, but it’s just part of the soundtrack

I smile though clearly, I am no friend of yours

I am massively defended, yet I do not feel safe

I have hurt you, but I do not feel your pain

I cry, but all my tears come out very dry

I sleep, only to awaken tired once again

I stop, yet time always keeps on going

I ask, but I reject any and all of your answers

I plead, but the one true judge remains mute

I suffer, yet there can be no redemption

I was spared, but it was only a random mercy

I was injured and I cannot ever heal

I struggle, but there is simply no escape

I gain, but enjoy only the briefest satisfaction

I learned much but did not build any wisdom

I gorge, but am simply unable to be satisfied

I drink too much, though sadly cannot stay drunk

I study the koran diligently, but in a foreign tongue

I lose, yet I cannot ever retain the lesson

I keep on buying though I have no real needs

I spend so much, but such are not investments

I tithe generously, but truly know no charity

I lay here quite still, yet I am not at peace

I whisper, but still it seems far too loud to me

I dig, but it is just my own shallow grave

I swallow, though it’s only more bitter pride

I leave and head off again to nowhere

I work hard, but still my debt increases

I always diet but never keep the weight off

I see much that I must leave to others to explain

I willfully ignore, and simply take refuge in my prayers

Hail The Anthropocene Era

Shortest geologic era on record, marked by a mass extinction due to human activity. AKA the Cretinaceous period.

Our consumer trends create market-driven conditions to which a species must either adapt: Or perish

We even act as if we can decide which life forms will survive based on whether we need or like them

Our micro-plastic litter shards have become an inert part of the food chain in every ocean on earth

And we can all ask in one talkinghead voice: What has any stinkin polarbear ever done for my family?

Our genetically-modified mono-cropped food plants drive evolution in the lifeforms we label as pests

Today, we tacitly agree that a sustainable environment is whatever remains after our latest progress

Industry assures us that we humans are immune from the otherwise toxic effects of their activities

We cannot not be constrained by divisive quarrels over irrelevant history, for we must move forward

The axiom that mere grasping self-interest optimizes everyone’s future anchors our economic beliefs

Clear skies, clean water and intact ecosystems are infinite free goods that must never be regulated

Tough pests and scraggly weeds near our fields are the new normal in plant and animal assemblages

Burying valleys in mountain-top coal mine slag merely emulates natural earthquakes and volcanoes

Dams and clearcuts select the strongest of those decimated salmon in our warmed and silted rivers

Bidding up prices on those few remaining bluefin tuna demonstrates marketplace species protection

Total species count and individual numbers decrease in direct proportion to our population increases

Extending our protection to lands, plants or animals declines with their short-term profit potential

Why, we all help alter the entire earth’s climate daily - simply by using electricity, driving and eating

And we may choose to decry, ignore, disbelieve or honor these efforts based on religion and politics

Many among us would call this era the Saviorscene as all our efforts are, of course, divinely-ordained

Habitat destruction is but one more evolutionary hurdle for the few surviving charismatic megafauna

Like a meteor strike, our population bloom stresses species - beneficially speeding up their evolution

Such as rats, cats, dogs, roaches and bedbugs profit briefly as well during our bubble-like ascendancy

Not only do we mortgage our futures but the slyest among us hedge against our very survival as well

An entitled greed is foremost among those Traditional Family Values™ that underpin our way of life

Any new chemical created may be spread freely until it’s proven to be harmful and explicitly banned

The best measure of human progress is GDP - Not biodiversity, sustainablility or habitat preservation

Modern culture venerates human life even as it destroys the very environment that makes it possible

The only necessary and sufficient condition to ensure our future is the pursuit of individual happiness

The best way to solve non-issues such as climate change is to innovate and profit from their effects

The current mass extinction is not human-caused and is just as natural as any of the previous five

A 3 ton SUV carapace is the ideal way for a human mother to shuttle her offspring about in safety

If Asians work toxic 16 hour shifts and sleep 20 to a room, clearly chickens cannot deserve too much

Blind faith in capitalism and trust in almighty God are our armor and sword in this battle for survival

Industry trade group soundbites are honest counterweights to cooked, elitist bad science research

Industrial self-regulation is the only real way to painlessly meet our Good Steward responsibilities

Know that this wondrous flowering of humanity doesn’t simply yield the seeds of its own destruction

Gimme That Good Old Red Meat - Cheap!

Hell, after all, “They're only animals”

Them vegans make me laugh, always whinin about some food animal holocaust goin on all around us

I jest ignore tales of atrocities committed on the spicy buffalo wings I suck down with good cold beer

Whatever antibiotic overuse dont really breed whatever resistant bacteria thats gonna get insida me

Why, I never even notice them smelly trucks goin by crammed with cattle shittin in each others faces

I say let the market decide how to handle em sos to put the cheapest meat on our good family tables

I don’t ever think about chicks confined to tiny, no-turn-around spaces pecking at each other’s faces

Hey, I’m OK ignoring highly automated mass production of inferior, food-grade life forms…fer profit

Look, if Chinese peasants work 16 hrs/day and sleep 20 to a room, why should piglets giteny better?

Aint listening ta their blatherin bout 3000 cows releasing the untreated shit ofa halfa-miyon people

Its not my problem if farms squeezed by Tyson choke Chesapeake oysters in untreated chicken crap

I support freedom-loving ranchers overgrazing, trampling and shitting in streams on our federal lands

And we must control any predators threatening their ruggedly-independent, gov’t-subsidized lifestyle

Just hush your fool squallin bout torturin them herd animals with an efficient solitary confinement

And stop promotin some fictional terror driving them thru dark lines at them bloody slaughterhouses

We’ll take our meat plastic-packaged and quite as unemotional as our Doritos, Thank you very much

Not interested in pichers athem layin in toxic muck in feedlots, Hey, they dont even know any better

Cost accountants and production engineers kin make the morally-right husbandry decisions fer us all

And our kids love squeezing extruded hamburg outta plastic cylinders lubricated with that pink slime

We laugh at the stupid lie that feedlot practices make our juicy grilled steaks wicked-carcinogenic

Hey, I aint looking at their faces! I just pick out their packaged parts in bright, clean, friendly stores

Simply refuse ta hear lame rants about red meat and nitrates causing all like heart attacks and shit

Really enjoy reaching for a good old doublemeat, bacon cheeseburger from my truck at the drivethru

Not concerned with the raw materials, but I do keep a close eye on the pricea finished meat goods

Meat’s just a part of our divinely-ordained dominion over this wonerful world He created jest fer us

Anyways, dumb animals have neither soul nor reason and they don’t feel pain, much less emotions

So, gahead - Truck them factory inputs around jest like theyas lumber, gas, beer or chinese drywall

After all, we been enjoyin meat for miyons ayears, we still need it to survive and we need it cheap

Ya know, them steers ain’t our kids pet dogs or something and it aint at all like damn cannibalism

I say ‘Out of Sight and Out of Mind’ until I get em up and sizzling on my $1500 backyard barbecue

See, the thoughts of real men don’t include nethin regardin the dignity and emotional needsa hawgs

An I’m sickta death athem elitist lies about sausage, bacon, salami and hotdogs rottin out my colun

Were bein good stewards: after all, we manage their lives from birth decon to slaugherhouse disposal

Look, I just gotta have some juicy red meat at least twice a day or my feminine side starts to emerge

And how can my boys grow up ta kill or be killed if I feed em that pusy damn tofu and soft white rice

I could care if they fatten cows on grain we could eat but they caint digest and then need more drugs

Intermsa meat, the Wal*Mart price philosophy does the trick fer us good traditional working families

Win Bigly With Us

Believe Me..

I’ll more easily slip the tough questions with soundbites and offer up fewer specifics on real problems

I bet I would convince more boys to blow themselves up to go to heaven as I remain alive, by His will

Sure, I could beat widely distributing a nutrition-free, melamine-laced chalk mixture as baby formula

Hey, I would double bar those factory fire doors so them lazy bastards couldn't sneak out for breaks

Of course I’d hire better lawyers so I could make more money than they did selling poisoned tobacco

I’d cancel more benefits in bankruptcy but my own golden parachute would remain forever inviolate

Absolutely, we’d focus harder on fighting cleanup costs than controlling our environmental impact

I’d never mention once the 500,000 collateral dead in my preemptively-defensive war of liberation

I’d get richer pimping a fictional eternal heaven I sell them for their promise of the souls I invented

I would better over-estimate savings and hide the true costs of my donor’s legislative initiatives

I can waltz right by my poverty-stricken brothers faster than you do, without even noticing at all

I’ll commit more surplus lives, not worth as much as my own family’s, to futures without healthcare

I’ll more pointedly ignore our mass extinction and demand Traditional Family Values™ even louder
You just watch me read canned speeches more stirringly, more to my poll benefit, after tragic events

I am quicker to justify throwing acid in any wife’s face if she offends Allah or my side of the family

I can hold up the EPA as the most wasteful of freedom-stealing jobkillers better than any of my rivals

I can demand more of their deaths should they defile our holy book with improper storage or disposal

Watch me sell parents on sacrificing children to my blind vanity more slickly than the last demagogue

For a bonus, I’ll shed workers and renege on their benefits far faster than other furtive execu-clones

I know I could kill more unbelievers via divine justice than the puny numbers they still boast about

I could find even more efficient, certainly less humane, ways to put good red meat on family tables

I would more proficiently solve the Geriatric Problem in order to save working folks some real money

My encouragement of proudly ignorant subjects to have lots of kids will have more divine backing

I’ll make outsourcing design, production and support for huge bonuses appear to be twice as patriotic

I could siphon off an even larger percentage of foreign aid to myself and my corrupt and evil cronies

I would further unfetter the free market to solve overblown issues like mining and industrial wastes

To promote peace, I would permit the sale of shock & awe weapons to any dictatorship supporting us

We would set up self-immolation stations so more terrorists can safely make a fiery last statement

I’ll cast secret spying on our citizens in a light that will make them beg to give up their privacy

I’d have them sofa-cheering louder for debt-financed, costly and immaterial, bipartisan compromises

Under me, they’ll poll even higher on environmental issues while singing ‘Drill Baby Drill’ ever louder

I promise to repeat, omit and distort better so they’ll believe they’re an exceptional, chosen people

I’ll really show what compassionate conservatism is all about even if the sinners dont know lord jesus

We’ll float even more ludicrous but temping quick fixes to problems nobody really wants to tackle

I’ll sell more lost girls into prostitution and little boys into drug-induced slaughter than my enemies

My donor’s lying, writer whores will make my opponent seem even more comically pathetic than me