Misguided Socialist Complaints:SAD!

    “I am telling you that anyone who is so much as angry with a brother or sister is guilty of murder” - Matthew 5:22
That fat, lazy Texan smoking in his oversize truck with the windows up in the grocery store fire lane

The jetskis, snowmobiles, ATVs, jeeps and dirtbikes behind fatass RVs with hot tubs and generators

Some useless former actor-politician pimping seniors reverse mortgage scams with a con artist smile

That libertarian free speecher with his truck window decal showing himself pissing on our President

Those so terribly clever sales tactics silently decreasing sizes 20%, but not yet raising the price

Congress and the president taking August off as well as only working 2.5 days/wk with job security

The fact that Bush will soon be a hero notwithstanding all their so-stupid lies and so many deaths

Another clueless redneck spraying 150 decibels out the jacked up giant pickup he can’t even afford

All those stories you don’t see anywhere else and all those you’ll never see on the Fair and Balanced

Bribed opinion leaders trusting only in Jeeesus, smugly certain that climate change science is a scam

Programmed talking heads whose continued employment hinges totally on their pissing people off

A corporate stock rising and its furtive CEO’s bonus increasing - On the great news of more big layoffs

Hearing for 20 minutes that “your call is very important to us, please stay on the line for the next...”

Having that nice person say they don’t make the rules - and that nobody you can talk to does, either

Ram-tough truck owners who struggle just to get up off the couch to fetch more Cheetos and beer

Angry illiterates ready to bomb the shit out of people and places they can’t spell or find on a map

Seeing lower class whites vote for their republican outsourcers who view them as entitled moochers

Paying $100 a month for the 2 channels the kids watch 15 minutes a day but keep on on 24x7

Spending months playing gov’t shutdown brinksmanship while everything else remains totally ignored

Government forced into spanish by slimy politicians just looking for votes: Europeans never got that

A narrow focus on GDP and Employment %s over the natural systems that foster their very existence

Reading daily new reports about the current man-made mass extinction that enables our progress

Seeing that the only action on climate change is to slice up the thawed arctic for resource extraction

Corpros draining ancient aquifiers for free and letting it mostly evaporate, sprayed into the hot wind

Those whose incessant, mindless mantra is “The US is ThE Greatest Country on Earth, USA-USA-USA!”

Hearing cretins who can’t read menus spout ‘Only Here can you get rich by yer own hard work alone’

Being told over and over again that competition gives us ThE finest healthcare system on thE planet

The certainty that our constitution is the holy grail, handed down to our forefathers by almighty god

Having a responsibility to babysit the Muslim world while everbody else just sits back and criticizes

65 year old, part-time doctors “earning” $200k a year with full benefits whose patients make $8/hr

Falsely trumpeting expiration of tax cuts for their 1% donors as ThE largest tax increase in history

The zero-sum game of replacing a good old boy network with various minority empowerment groups

The Catholics refusing to ordain women while coddling pedophiles and dressing oh, so openly gay

SUVs & P/Us idling obesely in drivethrus for that arterial sludge AKA bacon-double-cheeseburgers

Ruggedly independent welfare ranchers decimating federal wetlands and demanding predator control

Leadership that consists of wearing suits and reading speeches tuned for the latest voter opinion poll

Look, All Men Are Created Equal, Really.

We hold this <unsubstantiated> truth to be self-evident…

I am of those tangled family lines raised in public housing by a single parent for some 5 generations

My parents lay in bed reading child-raising books and playing Mozart to me - inside mommy’s womb

My mom didn’t know she was pregnant or cut back on partAing until I was 4 months inside her tummy

Mommie took vitamin and nutritional supplements, had lots of ultrasounds and walked on a treadmill

My dad smacked the shit right out my momma and lefup outta here before I ever seen him

My parents took birthing classes together before I was ever conceived

Cigarettes helped my mother relieve her sufferings from withdrawal during my fetal development

She always killed 99.97% of all the germs in our safe and lovely suburban home

The teachers could see that I was doomed to failure from my earliest school days, so they ignored me

Everyone always assured my family that I certainly was an especially gifted and high-achieving child

I amused my growing brain by peeling off flakes of lead-filled paint to chew upon

I had so much warmth and stimulation that it appeared to them that I grew wise before my years

We got our nutrition from government programs that paid for us to eat from cans and cellophane

My developing mind and body were nurtured by the very best in current pop science nutrition wisdom

I had project TVs and boomboxes pumping rap and ad music into my crib 24x7 that got me my rhythm

My mom drove me to pre-kindergarten classes and play dates starting before I was 3

I was shuffled in with my drunk grannie by social services when mom lost our welfare apartment

I was surrounded and nurtured by grandparents, uncles and aunts all the days of my childhood

Nobody even noticed I needed glasses til I accidentally got my first eye test one day in the 5^th grade

Mom kept me strictly to the various meds they prescribed for the tragic ADHD masking my brilliance

I was chauffeured to all kinds of lessons and sports activities every day after school and all weekend

I learned independence being a latchkey kid whose only parent was off hoin fuh hart drugs

Everyone assured my folks from the very beginning that I would attend a very good college

School stopped working for me once I got pregnant for the first time, in the 9^th grade

I had a pet dog named Tuffie that I still miss to this day

I grew up with rats, roaches, lice, scabies and bedbugs as well as asthma

My slightly crooked smile was repaired for less than $5000

My teeth were soaked in sugar until they all rotted and simply fell out before I ever saw a dentist

We flew off to pricey destinations for all our well-deserved spring, summer and holiday breaks

We stole a car and took a joyride way out to where everbody knew we dinaha no biness

I occasionally mowed our perfectly green lawn for an extra $150 a month spending allowance

They showed me how ta make money carryin bags of whatever stuff around fa them

Now I have these allergies and auto-immune disorders and they say it’s cause I never got dirty

Shivved an enemy banger in a prison fight who turned out to be some uncle I neva even knew I hat

Spent 6 years part-Aing to get my degree in Communications and then became this chatty barista

Don’t run the screets nomo cause these bullet wounds left me all limpin an huffin like some old fool

A Far Left Elitist Confesses

Oliver:”Hello, my alias is ‘Jarred‘ and I am an elitist and I need to share our secret agenda with you.” Group: “Hello, Jarred”

We will force you from your pickups and SUVs into costly, cramped, dangerous and sexless electrics

Our agenda includes confiscating and recycling all of your firearms as we increase our own stockpiles

We demand you surrender our overblown national sovereignty to that socialist UN New World Order

You must enjoy scraggly overpriced organic kale instead of tortured doublemeat baconcheeseburgers

Our government simply must spend trillions for global warming even if we aren’t really sure it exists

We’ll smother your ignorant and loud free speech beneath our wet blanket of political correctness

Your individual contributions shall be brutally downplayed given our focus upon group cohesiveness

Doctors must submit lists of the excess elderly for review by our obamacare death panel bureaucrats

FOX News will be shut down and be replaced by our taxpayer-funded, socialist public-broadcasting

Our stated aims will over-regulate this fair country into bankruptcy, depression and universal poverty

Our mantra is “Tax And Spend by Taking from the rich to waste on the bureaucracy of the poor…”

Everyone must be forced not only to recycle everything but to pay thru the nose for the intrusion

We intend to further cripple the military, leaving us open to terrorist attack and foreign domination

We will replace worship of those in NFL tights with an elitist need for french cyclists, also in spandex

Your home thermostats and vehicle accelerators shall be controlled by bureaucrats in Washington

Property rights will be trampled under the rubric of saving a few filthy rodents and drab, tiny birds

Gas taxes are to be quadrupled and domestic drilling shall be completely ended as soon as possible

The government will choose winning green energy companies to give huge and condition-less grants

We will transform the world such that it appears as if all citizens were handicapped in every fashion

There will be a national LGBT holiday for those vast new hordes of government workers on the dole

Instead of overbearing cosmetized talking heads shouting we shall fund only boring reasoned debates

Your lovely manicured, green lawns must wither to save water and to halt your poisoned yard runoff

Bureaucrats will determine when and how many children you are allowed to bear and abort the rest

Ranchers may only watch as cattle are killed by wolves and bears on newly confiscated gov’t lands

We intend to nationalize all golf courses and turn them into brown, unmotorized bird sanctuaries

You will report for exercise every morning before work or pay a stiff fine to be used for obamacare

Under our regime, broccoli and tofu will replace burgers and fries and people must say they like it

Work shall no longer be viewed as a key element in helping our population form positive self-images

Our secular-socialist welfare state will promise an ever-increasing stream of entitlements - For votes

Businesses will be bankrupted when we bind the federal minimum wage to the cost of living index

The poor will be paid by the government to reject undignified and/or unsatisfying job opportunities

Unemployment will be seamlessly joined to disability & then to social security for those not working

Snowmobiles, jetskis, dirtbikes, ATVs, speedboats and Harleys will taxed out of existence, ASAP

We fully intend to grant amnesty & welfare to illegal aliens as well as welcoming their entire families

New limits on noise pollution shall be strictly enforced by our Neighborhood Citizen Committees

Your trash will be taxed by weight and black ribbons will identify wasteful consumer homes to all

Miyonsa Preverted DEv8s

Them preverted dEv8s are tryin ta take over the goverment just like they rueend alla the schools

Sustainabillies buzzin with they joyless, fat-free hidden agenda all up in our faces, like filthy flies

Hideously brazen LGBTQs stalking our kids out in the streets, on TV and in they smartphones as well

Skinny vegans pushin rotten overpriced organic wedgies over good-od doublemeat bacon cheeseburgs

We're miyonsa not so bright and ignerant republicans who still refuse ta see whos pullin our strings

We even believe we’ll be back ta gettn snowmobiles, jetskis and ATVs on credit from our houses

Just talkin tax cuts, socialism and the EPA, real patriots may get enough votes to keep the 1% on top

We’ll all be drivin tough, new cheap-diesel pickups just as soon as them over-regelaturs gets flushed

Why, them bastards wanna us ta actuelly get outta our vehicles and go like walk around or somethin

Always pushin fat, incompitint, hissy, handicapped, gay, women acolor up front fer them permotions

Wantin to scam us on they overpriced whatever artisun bread, shade coffee, frinch cheese and shit

Seen their goddam squirrelly talk shows before, goin way too detailed and not even raisin ther voices

We stand by our coal-fired thermostats in this righteous war against that costly climate change fraud

Locked onto the Fair and Balanced for guidance thru this vast and tricky liberal media conspirecy

Damn straight that Endangered Species Act has got to go – right along with that unholy, jobkillin EPA

WTF has that overreachin Clean Water Act ever done cept to cost us all abuncha jobs and money?

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Those lame apartment pickup truck cowboys can’t know how good it feels to go hybrid hyper-miling

Why can’t they see they’re killin their kids with candybars, tube steaks, cheetos and Mountain Dew?

They just keep beggin for more money for so-called dEfense while we’re flyin off that fiscal cliff

Guess they’re OK with making less every year and with more tax cuts for the 1% who offshored them

They actually believe that taxing the rich will ruin their own vapid negative savings rate lifestyles

Think that going for free to the ER is what ThE world’s finest healthcare system is really all about

Not afraid of diabetes, high blood pressure or cholesterol, heart disease or obesity, not one damn bit

Expressing true freedom and liberty by waddling about in their lameass fat pickups and giant SUVs

Simply refuse to see how blindly promoting gay, handicapped, female humans of color benefits us all

The rich need their votes but know that they’re really all trapped in that entitlement mentality

Paying $350/mo for phone, internet and HDTV is what it is for the privilege of being an American

But just how do they figure that carrying 27% interest balances on 5 credit cards is prudent finance?

Must fix the deficit but, for the love of god, Don’t touch our social security, medicaid or raise taxes!

And of course we must rebuild our crippled military, why, that’s one thing Everbody can agree on

So, yeah, if they’re too stupid to be eating broccoli already, there’s no point in forcing it down them

They think it’s not fair to pay taxes on the money saved via foreclosure, because they’re still broke

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If you ax me, everbudy needs ta be armed at all times ta put a real quick stop to them cereal killers

The only diet we found that really works is to binge and scratch on Meth til hour teeth turn black

Energy independence means wearin shorts all winter and idlin our P/Us 20 minutes ta warm em up

So, who is it that really profits from our ignorance AND convinces us ta be so damn proud of it?

Just Another Never Could Have Been

It sucks to be a has been, now with all your greatness gone

I hate those could have beens, they’ve wasted real potential

It’s worse to be a might have been, robbed by fate of a rightful chance

But I know I’m a never could have been and it is what it is

The guys who live alone in the glory of their past are simply pitiful

Those who almost made it still have something to look back upon

The dreams the might-haves had, though unfulfilled, are the stuff of stories

But knowing in your heart you never had what it takes is simply black and white

They said we’s all self-evidently created equal

But even from the beginning some fall far behind

And advantages grow larger at ever-incredasing rates

None of that ever mattered to me for I was born a never could have been

It’s hard, having been a star, to adapt to a new and ordinary normal

Too often they simply cannot consider that it may be time to quit

So many do not even know when could be changed to might have been

But for the never could have been life abides eternally in a drab consistency