I Keep Doing These Stupid Things

I might glance, but you cannot force me to see

I may hear, but I don’t actually have to listen

I considered, but I am certainly not about to heed

I can continue talking - and keep saying nothing

I struggle on, though I still refuse to fight

I laugh, but it’s just part of the soundtrack

I smile though clearly, I am no friend of yours

I am massively defended, yet I do not feel safe

I have hurt you, but I do not feel your pain

I cry, but all my tears come out very dry

I sleep, only to awaken tired once again

I stop, yet time always keeps on going

I ask, but I reject any and all of your answers

I plead, but the one true judge remains mute

I suffer, yet there can be no redemption

I was spared, but it was only a random mercy

I was injured and I cannot ever heal

I struggle, but there is simply no escape

I gain, but enjoy only the briefest satisfaction

I learned much but did not build any wisdom

I gorge, but am simply unable to be satisfied

I drink too much, though sadly cannot stay drunk

I study the koran diligently, but in a foreign tongue

I lose, yet I cannot ever retain the lesson

I keep on buying though I have no real needs

I spend so much, but such are not investments

I tithe generously, but truly know no charity

I lay here quite still, yet I am not at peace

I whisper, but still it seems far too loud to me

I dig, but it is just my own shallow grave

I swallow, though it’s only more bitter pride

I leave and head off again to nowhere

I work hard, but still my debt increases

I always diet but never keep the weight off

I see much that I must leave to others to explain

I willfully ignore, and simply take refuge in my prayers